Staying single for summer.

After doug.. I need a break for a while. It’s just.. probably because I need to be by myself for this sumer. Not have to worry of someone. To care about someone so much it hurts. To miss them like crazy because I can’t go out as much as other girls can. I won’t date for a while. It’s not that doug had such a big effect on me that i had to be single for a while. Just him breaking up with me.. Made me realize I don’t need a relationship right now.. He still had a big effect on me though. (:

I probably won’t meet anyone new this summer. All summer, I’m going to be running around 7 AM for a mile or 2 5 days a week. Playing tennis for an hour or 2 3 times a week.  I need to start practicing. My friends probably won’t ask to hang out. They never do over summer anyways. (x Who knows. But this summer, it’s going to be all by myself.

#i hate using affect and effect  #i get confused  

How many times will I be left home alone..

my fear is taking over me.

I knew it.

I just knew it… I’m over flowing with too many emotions I cannot handle. My body is trembling with madness but yet the tears build up from an aching heart.

I feel stupid.

For just running off like that. i shouldve just sat there, and stayed. and endured everything and stayed happy until i got home where i could be by myself.

But I guess i’m just stupid. Don’t feel bad.. Just know you are doing everything for the better. Feeling bad for me isn’t the best thing to do.

I’m sorry for being a little ignorant.

I ran off crying because my heart was pounding so fast and hard it began to hurt. My eyes were watering up as if there was a waterfall about to perform. I’m okay really. (: And I’m glad you are happier this way too. (: It was so much fun and full of memories that I could never forget. I thank you for that.

I love you. (:

My hair is probably going to be wavy almost everyday now.

My cousin told me your hair grows fast when its braided at night or something. :P

What do I do with it.

It’s coming in on thursday.

I really hope you like your gift.

the other parts to it are really corny and gay and i don’t even know if you’ll like it.